A few things before I disappear off into a mist of dirty tables.

No one is allowed to say "poker" in comments ever again. Seriously. Just try and say the word "poker" and see how fast your comment is denied.

Poker was such a source of my blog's spam problem that I outlawed the damn word.

Tomorrow, I fill out all those jolly tax forms and what not for a bussing job at Wolfgang Pucks. In the end they gave me the option of food running or bussing and I took bussing. This is because of my fear of uneaten food, probably. Or is it change? All I know is that I'm going to get accustomed to the place before I dive into a whole new thing.

Now my book can begin AND end with me bussing tables! You know, with all of that weight loss and television appearances and fan mail and book deals and inspiring thousands of other people to lose weight and not being able to walk through a single Wal-Mart without seeing myself make a slushee on the TV sets above the cracker aisle in the middle.

Prologue: I clean people's tables.
Parts 1-5: I taste fame. Love.
Epilogue: I clean people's tables again.

Seriously though, it just feels right. Even with working four days a week, I'll probably end up writing more than I do today. I kind of need my time to feel more precious.

I've been starting chapters with blog posts. How much do you want to bet this post makes it into the end of the book? Even this part about the post making it into the book will make it, you watch.

So if this is in the book, I should say... Enjoy the epilogue! I hope it's a doozy! Because, at the time of this post, I've yet lived it.

You may turn the page now.