Need a condo, a car crash, a gas shortage, pollution?

I guess I never tore the mobile billboard a new asshole, so now is as good a time as any.

Our apartment complex is advertising on a mobile billboard now. It makes me crazy. Not that they're selling these apartments as condos, but that they've taken it to that ultimate level of spectacle. That there's a damn truck that's only purpose is driving a billboard around in circles all day long. The damn billboard might as well say, "Follow me to your new home!" because it's route is naturally one big circle around the complex.

I just hate billboard trucks. They just scream, "LOOK AT WHAT WE CAN FUCKING AFFORD. WE CAN AFFORD TO PISS GASOLINE DOWN THE DRAIN ALL DAY LONG."

I just want to ram into the damn things with a stretch-Hummer. Why the hell aren't they illegal? Seeing as they are wrong on all four levels of Christian Stella's Scale of Wrongness.

1. They are a distraction on the road.
2. They are unnecessary traffic on the road, specifically driving DURING rush hour for the most exposure.
3. They waste gasoline as the government is asking us to conserve.
4. They're a truck. They pollute the damn air.

So, "Follow this truck to your new home! Don't mind the pollution from this billboard as it circles your new home all day long."

What I think would really be funny is if someone was driving in the lane to the left of the billboard and the billboard has sold them and they're looking for the complex, but all they can see out the passenger window is the billboard because it's 12 feet high and 15 feet long and so they miss the place entirely and then just drive all the way to Wyoming because condos don't cost $273,000 for a one bedroom there.