Jack Osbourne and the amazing discovery.

So I stumbled into watching this three part documentary with Jack Osbourne, called Jack Osbourne: Adrenaline Junkie. It was, quite simply, amazing.

The fat, drinking, drugging bastard cleaned up his act and then decided that he wanted to climb El Capitan, a Yosemite rock face that is three times as high as the Empire State Building.

The documentary was basically him preparing for the climb by doing crazy shit like running with the bulls in Spain and climbing in The Alps. In the process, he lost 70 pounds.

Now, people climb mountains every day, but there was something incredible about this because of the complete 180 Jack Osbourne has gone through since the last time I ever watched The Osbournes on MTV.

He did make it up El Capitan in five nights and six days. Six days of digging your fingers into cracks in mostly flat rock, sleeping on a collapsable platform, bolted into the rock with one bolt, thousands of feet above the earth.

Now I hear he wants to spend the next 13 years training to go to the moon. No shit. He wants in on President Bush's whole "We're going to go back to the moon; then Mars!" thing.

So the least I could do was get the fuck into the gym this morning. For the first time since we moved in.

And I feel good.

And I made the most amazing discovery.

You see, our 24-hour gym here is in the clubhouse, which doesn't look all that big from the outside. I mean, who would've imagined that there is...

A FULL SIZED, FULLY ENCLOSED, 24-HOUR, RACQUETBALL COURT UP IN THAT SHIT. It's ubelievable. Nobody even uses the thing. I have to go out and buy the necessary implements immediately. The racquets and the balls. But then we're in business.