September 2005 Archives

It's been a week since my parents got the galleys for the new cookbook. If I don't get them tomorrow, I'll probably lose my mind. It's not like I co-wrote it or anything.

When I moved, I asked the Big Double S to send me a few galleys, so that my parents wouldn't have to go through the trouble of resending some of their copies to me.

Quote:

No problem at all to get galleys sent there-- they'll go out directly to you once they're ready.

Lost in the shuffle, I swear. I got a Best Buy rebate check faster than these advance reader's copies, if that tells you anything.

Fun Fact Day:

It's come to my attention that Ribcage is now more than a year old. No matter how hard Adam Wekarski tries, I've mostly made my deadline. (I think I missed it once, but there have been plenty of close calls.) Since the site opened, it has had an average of 14 unique visitors a day. Not the number I expected, but that's nearly 100 different people reading the story each week. Most people read on Thursdays, not Wednesdays. That would probably be because I'm always posting the stories so damn close to Thursday. Overall, the site has had 7,000 hits.

There are 21 copies of Ribcage: Volume 1 out and about. The book's page at Lulu has had 425 hits. The book resides on at least five coffee tables, so I'm happy. The second volume is a third of the way finished.

104 different people have downloaded Things You Can't Give Up, the free deleted chapters from my book. That page has had nearly 600 hits.

My blog has had more than 46,000 hits in less than two years. This is the 844th post to date.

My weight loss book is currently 38,145 words. This week, I am going to start writing it again.

I do exist and I'm not just a part-time photoblogger as it may appear. Though I do have a picture of this place we ate at called Mr. Goodburger that I took with my cameraphone and should post sometime, but not now... because I do have words.

New words over at Ribcage. Because it is twenty minutes until Thursday and, apparently, that's when I post new stories!

Hooray!

This week,

The Good Thing About Living Amongst the Rubble

Lydia Davis freed me from the assumption that stories had to have a familiar arc and equally familiar length. So about two years ago I started jotting down notes for short short stories, most of them taking their cue from some small moment that I watched or thought about - usually something that wouldn't or couldn't find its way into a novel, and which didn't warrant a longer story. The results are very different from Davis's - hers are brilliant acts of philosophical origami, while mine are little moments in the lives of abnormal people.

And of course there's something very satisfying about beginning and finishing the writing of a story in one sitting.

-Dave Eggers regarding his weekly "short short stories" for The Guardian UK's Weekend magazine.

Un-fucking-believable. I wrote this about Dave Eggers' How We Are Hungry reminding me of Ribcage months and months ago and now I find out that he was writing weekly flash fiction pieces for over a year.

There's even a book compiling them out in the UK as well. It's 64 pages and selling for less than three US dollars, but International shipping of the little bastard brings it up to $15.

The good news is, they're all available to read online here.

I have some reading to do.

But first, I'm going to look at airplanes. I'll be back on Monday.

...over at Ribcage today.

That That They Had Created

Picked these two video cards out at Wal-Mart for Elise and her mother, only to find out that they're for AGP slots and the computers only have PCI slots open. Felt like a moron. Now I have to return them like one.

We framed the Jay Ryan prints!

But obviously, we've yet to actually hang them on the wall.

Dr. Seuss made us a wine rack.

It doesn't have any wine on it though. But it will! Three more months and I'm twenty-one. Oh and that's all hand-blown glass. It's pretty crazy.

We have these benches outside of our apartments...

But they're also garbage cans...

They pick up the garbage twice a week and it's a beautiful thing, being on the third floor and all.

Finally, here is Elise holding a baby lizard with her thumb and forefinger.

I keep telling people about the blurring of the line between Orlando and Kissimmee and just how much shit is being built around here, because it's both ridiculous and astounding to see. I mean, it's been less than two years since I originally left Florida.

This week we left our apartment and ran into a Super Wal-Mart about one minute down the road. One that is actually nice, surprisingly. Here, we'd been driving fifteen minutes in the opposite direction to what we were sure was the closest Wal-Mart.

Then we found the new Super Target, that I heard about but didn't realize was RIGHT THERE.

I now know of SEVEN Super Wal-Marts within the Kissimmee/St. Cloud/South Orlando area.

Nothing is as crazy as what they've built on the corner of John Young and Osceola Parkway. They call it, The Loop... I call it The Biggest Fucking Shopping Center, For Sure.

Some storefronts are still available to rent, and yet there is already or will be an ABC Liquor, American Eagle Outfitters, Bed Bath and Beyond, Claire's, Cool Cuts 4 Kids, CVS, Dress Barn, Famous Footwear, Hairmasters, Justice, Kay Jeweler's, Kirkland's, Kohl's, Lee Nails and Spa, Lenscrafters, Michaels, Old Navy, Pacific Sunwear, Petco, Pier 1 Imports, Regal 16 Cinemas, Ross, Sports Authority, Vitamin World, Yankee Candle Company, Barnies Coffee, Ben and Jerry's, Chili's, Chipotle Mexican Grill, Johnny Rockets, Macaroni Grill, Mama Fu's, Panera Bread, Red Brick Pizza, Wendy's and a bank.

And it isn't a mall... it's a shopping center. And I've never even heard of some of those places.

And it should be noted that there isn't a bookstore in that list. Kissimmee just doesn't read.

I tried to take a photo of the place, but only four of the forty planned stores would fit in one picture.

A search online revealed this press release...

The Loop, the area’s brand new 440,000-square foot retail center, has been open for just a few months, but already developers can see that consumer interest outweighs the site’s retail capacity.

Due to unprecedented retail and consumer interest in The Loop, Kissimmee/Orlando’s new open-air shopping complex, developers have begun taking steps for expansion. The Wilder Companies are developing a 40-acre parcel of land adjacent to The Loop’s site on John Young and Osceola Parkways, and intend to add up to 400,000 square feet of retail space to the property. ‘Loop West’ is slated to open in late 2007.

It's going to fucking double in size. Holy crap am I glad I live far enough away from there.

It's regretful that I have to meet Elise's extended family under terrible circumstances. First her mother's side and now this week, her father's.

Neither of us have much experience with this and for the second time this year, I have to say that not saying something when there is clearly something would be disrespectful.

I have plenty of posts I've been meaning to write, most of them funny and inconsequential--because that's how I like it--but I also have a very busy week... hopefully, here, online--it will be business as usual.

The flash on my camera only works on objects that are close enough to bite the lens, so all of these photos came out black, even though all of the lights are on. With the flash off, all the photos came out blurry. Still, we've finished unpacking, put some of the pictures on the walls... so here are some photos that are either grainy from being brightened into oblivion or grainy from being sharpened into oblivion.

The other thing is... everything looks miniature in them. This, the grainiest of the photos should give a good idea of scope... that's Elise in the kitchen...

I have a lot of photos from our drive down to Florida, but these are the three that stand out.

We passed this long line of New York ambulances, at least a dozen of them, all headed for New Orleans.

I gave the thumbs up to the drivers, of course.

Here is Elise eating Baked Lays. Enjoy!

And finally, there is Sedna. Sedna is not a fan of road trips. The proof is in this photo of him strapped into the backseat. The blue things are his new claw covers.

Today is a Wednesday isn't it? I guess I'll have to write a Ribcage story when I wake up. After I take the four thousand empty boxes to the compactor. After Elise's dentist appointment. After we change our addresses at the bank. After we pick up some frames at Wal-Mart for our Jay Ryan prints. After Elise's mother comes by to see the new place.

What I'm saying is, this puppy's going to come late tomorrow night!

Pictures of the new apartment are STILL forthcoming. There are still so many things to unpack. Though, all but one nightstand is built.

Everyone wants to call us away from our boxes and I'd love to... but...

The screws and things from one of THIRTEEN pieces of furniture we are assembling. This particular piece is a NIGHTSTAND. With that many screws and things!

I really like the pieces that insist you screw something into a solid piece of wood that doesn't even have a pre-made hole.

Elise had to run to Walgreens for a bottle of New Skin, on account of the blisters the screwdriver has given us.

But what we've made is beautiful, so I can't complain.

Completed so far:
-dining room table with four chairs
-computer desk
-computer chair
-coffee table
-side table

On our last day in Connecticut, Corinne took us around Norwalk, Darien and Stamford on a grand tour of restaurants, thrift stores and a quick stop off for this really cold, spiced rice milk at a place called "Tacos Mexico". I swore I'd forget the name of that concoction, and I did.

Here, it is what Elise is drinking.

Corinne found this, displays it prominently in her vehicle.

I didn't pay very much attention to the local news, but apparently there was a lack of oxygen in the water and many, many, many fish suffocated. Windy days, you could smell them behind my house... miles from the water.

Elise and Corinne.

Sadly, my camera went as dead as that fish and I actually had to LIVE the rest of the day instead of just taking pictures of it.

Though it took us four days, though we drove straight into a tropical storm that sat across I95 for days, building strength, becoming a hurricane.

We've been here and we've been busy. Moved into the apartment last night. It was horrible, but quick. Ryan and Natalie helped more than could be imagined. And then Elise and I slept on the floor.

Today we have cable, so here I am.

This apartment is beautiful beyond belief. It's positively amazing. The nicest apartment I've seen around Central Florida. I'll take photos once more is unpacked, furniture is built, etc.

I also have photos from our last day in Connecticut and from the road. I'd post them now, but I have to assemble a dining room table.

We packed our stuff into a U-Haul and then from a U-Haul to a Semi container. You should have seen how we packed this semi. Upon their suggestion, I had only reserved 5 feet out from the back wall of the container. Everything we owned had to fit in a space that was shorter than the length of a car! I've made a lot of moves in my life, but I'm quite astonished by this pack job. Everything is in perfect place and we didn't even have to build it up too high. Now I'll pray that it gets to Florida in one giant, interlocking piece.

Hopefully I'll take a photo before we unpack it next week.

I am so glad that I went this route, that I'm saving even more money on gas...

And that I'm not buying unnecessary gas, because now is the time for everyone to conserve. Not because of shortages, but to slap OPEC in the face.

Elise's car gets great mileage and my car doesn't exist, so I'm feeling pretty good about our enabling.

Then again, I've always been quick to say that gas in England is always more than double than America and they don't seem to mind. That maybe we're just spoiled.

We have Hummers and they have those miniature Smart Cars that I want so badly, even if they do look like they'll flatten in an accident.

Speaking of accidents--the details of the one Kelly and Jeremy were in last night are better left to them and their own blogs, but scary nonetheless. They are both okay; miraculously. I'm not a big believer in the miraculous, but holy shit.

They were less than five hours into their own sort of road trip and it's a stern reminder for my own, come Sunday. I haven't driven since Elise moved up here in December. Before that, I had not driven in over a year. Thankfully and most definitely because of my recently dry driving record, I'll drive like an old lady. Slow and safe. Though, scratch the old lady thing, because I want to put an emphasis on safe.

Tomorrow is our Farewell Connecticut tour with Corinne and then Sunday we're gone. I'm sure I'll have a few photo essays on this blog after I get my computer back up and running.

We're in Florida Tuesday night. I'm sure I'll post something from some computer, sometime next week.

Ribcage is set to post a story automatically this upcoming Wednesday. For once a story will appear before the sun goes down! Heck, before it even comes up.

We're moving into our apartment Friday evening. Right now, it looks like we have no one to help and it's on the third story. If you're free next Friday for an hour or two at 5:30 and you're in Florida and I know who you are: call my cell... or Elise's cell... or email me and I'll check it when I get to Florida.

I'll buy you dinner, you know?