What kind of piece of shit insurance card isn't even accepted by Quest Diagnostics? Quest having just about as many locations as Wendy's and Quest being the go-to company for blood and urine tests in this country.
Very important looking letter in the mail. It's obviously that pin number CapitalONE said they were mailing out, so that I can use my credit card to withdraw cash at ATMs. Ahh my credit card... stepping stone to future financial respect.
So I flip the envelope over and pry my finger in, break the glue--see that it says "Quest Diagnositcs" right there on the flap.
The doctor's office was nice enough to send me a copy of my blood results, but it took some coaxing. This is obviously why. Quest sends the results out themselves... duh! A copy to my doctor. A copy to me. Makes sense. And so I'm
A bill.
Alright, alright, all right, all right... all... right. What? Backitup.
You take a dog in to get some sort of innoculation, let's say. They say, "It's twenty dollars for the vaccine and sixty for the visit and heck, we can cut the dog's nails for you for only six dollars more!"
You say, "Sounds good!" And then the dog gets the shot, gets clipped, gets on it's merry way. No surprises.
You take me into a doctor's office with a vague list of anemic symptoms. They say, "The doctor will see you now." The doctor says, "This is a tricky one. We'll need to run a blood test. I'll run it for everything. B12 folate. Lyme disease, you name it."
Later, the receptionist tells you that you owe $198. And so you pay them and... go on your merry way.
And so maybe I'm completely naive, having believed that that $198 was obviously broken down like this...
-Around $150 for the visit.
-Around $50 for the blood test.
That seemed... correct... to me anyway.
And maybe it's because nobody in that office--the receptionist, two nurses or my doctor--decided to talk costs. I of course realize the two-way street aspect of that argument, but shouldn't a doctor be required by law to say these things? To perhaps tell me what running my blood for "everything" really costs.
Because it costs $800.
Those tests, the ones that I mostly don't understand were now listed there, money values attached. This is so I can know that I owe $98 for an IGG test, whatever that is.
Now that I'm nineteen, this bill is of course, in my name. On my credit. My future financial respect.
My father arranged a payment plan. All is well, including myself... no thanks to this $1,000 doctor visit. If I only stopped eating wheat a day earlier, I'd be a thousand dollars richer.
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