I just had to jump out of the shower because I could no longer stand up. I tried to vomit... but the only thing I've had to eat in two days is half a can of pineapples.
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I looked in the mirror.
The back of my tongue is black.
It was time to go to the emergency room. Something is most certainly wrong with one of my organs... liver, pancreas, something.
I lay down for 20 minutes.
I look up "black tongue" on google. It's a side effect of Pepto Bismol. I've been taking Pepto Bismol all day. I am probably not dying. I think I'll go back to sleep now.
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